Ramble Ramble

Things have been rather morose around here lately, what with the lost cat, the sleep deprivation, the stress, etc. So I’m making today’s list a list of things that are making me happy.

1. I’m wearing my wedding rings again.I had to take them off pretty early in my pregnancy, and even though I lost all the “baby weight” I haven’t been able to wear them since. I think what happened was this: I gained about 30 pounds between getting married and having the kid. The rings still “fit” because I never took them off and so I had that ring indentation that ends up happening, but when I had to take them off during my pregnancy, I lost that indentation. Hence, losing the baby weight wasn’t going to do much of anything for my ability to wear the rings. SO–I finally broke down and had them resized. Do I want to lose that 30 pounds I put on post wedding/pre-baby? Of course. But I want to wear my wedding ring whether I do that or not. So now I’m happily sporting a 1/2 size larger.
2. I’ve read 5 books in the last week. Remember when I said I missed reading? Apparently, I’m back on the wagon! Granted, 8 hours of travelling helped my book count (I read two on the flight to New York), but still, it’s awesome.
3. Room service. Is spendy, but so awesome.
4. My iPhone, when it’s working. Such a total toy, but I love that thing. It was super handy while I was driving around to various shelters looking for Bailey (yay maps!), I love being able to carry my blog with me to start posts, I love that I can carry a million photos of the kid with me at any given time. Just all around yay! (iPhone users, got any apps you just can’t live without? I’m always a little overwhelmed with the app store, but love new apps.)
5. Our neighborhood. Our neighbors have been great since the cat went missing. We’ve gotten a few calls, not that they found him, but of condolences. We’ve had people stop us while we wandered the neighborhood calling for Bailey so they could get a description and our phone number in case they saw him. One little girl in the neighborhood even made me a card saying “I’m sorry your kitty left.” It’s been a sad reason to get to know our neighbors, but it makes me feel good that we live in a community like that.
6. A late addition to this post: Bailey has been spotted near the house! Oh my God, you guys, I had just about given up hope. Serious despair and wailing and rending of garments. It’s been raining the past few days in San Diego, and I thought for sure if he didn’t come home in the rain he was long gone. But N.C. got a call from one of our neighbors who had seen the cat, and now my husband has seen him with his own two eyes. He appears to be hiding out about 1/2 a block from the house (hanging out under a car to stay out of the rain). Now it’s just down to catching him before he spooks and runs further away. I’m still a little nervous since he’s not actually HOME, but at least I know he’s not dead via coyote, or drowned in the storm drain. I can’t even begin to tell you how happy this makes my heart. Happy, happy, happy!!

As always, more lists can be found over at Anna’s at abdpbt!

Looks like I’m finally coming up for a little bit of air. And the angels sang out from the heavens.

But since I’m not quite 100% through the hell on earth that has been work lately, my brain is just a mishmash of stuff, sooooooo bullets it is:

• I really, really want to update my blog with a new theme and some new functionality (hello threaded comments!). Especially after working on these website redesigns at work. And I’ve been toying with the idea of trying the Thesis theme, even though it’s kind of spendy, as a treat for my little ole blog. But when I get home and have a free minute after the kid is asleep, working on the blog is invariably trumped these days by Battlestar Galactica DVD’s or new episodes of Lost.
• I consider one of my major accomplishments in life my ability to sing along, in time, to the Garth Brooks song Ain’t Goin’ Down (’Til the Sun Comes Up). I can almost keep up with the crazy long notes…but I usually *just* run out of breath.
• Sometimes I really miss driving a stick shift. Until I’m stuck in traffic.
• I inadvertently wore a shirt with a hole in it today. My bad.
• I’ve been trying out Threadsy.com, thanks to Anna at abdpbt. It’s kind of a cool way to consolidate email, twitter and facebook in one place. The interface is perhaps not totally my ideal, but since I have 4 email address on top of my twitter and facebook pages, it’s a handy little way to combine everything (perfect for checking at work!). If anyone is interested, I have some invites left that I’d happily share!
• The most used parts of my iPhone? The clock, the Facebook app, a Weather Channel app, and the Safari browser. Yes, I am that boring. The phone part? Waaaaayyyyyyy at the bottom of the list.
• I had someone at work correct my word usage 5 times in one conversation. He knew he was being a jerk–even said so–but continued to do it. I finally told him that if he didn’t knock it off, I was going to stop working on his website. Not that I would actually do that, but it felt nice to pretend.
• I go to New York in a week for a conference. I am not excited. Usually I like my little trips back to New York–they let me visit with friends and old co-workers, revisit favorite restaurants, and peruse the few parts of the city that I miss. This year? Not so much. I’m not looking forward to trying to figure out what the hell to wear in the cold for 4 days, I’m not looking forward to potential snow, and I’m definitely not looking forward to being away from the kid for the first time (well, overnight away from the kid. We’ve left him with babysitters plenty).
• I have had a crazy neck/shoulder/arm pain for the last few days. I dunno what I did, but it hurts to reach for the radio in the car. I’m afraid I have a pinched nerve…
• I really miss reading. I haven’t really read much over the last year (GASP!), in the way of real books anyway, and I’m starting to get the itch. I’ve always been a bookworm (there were times when I probably read upwards of 100 books a year), and I kind of can’t believe how much I’ve gotten away from it.  I think I’m going to start using my time pumping at work to read rather than stress about not working for a double bonus.

What mishmash is on your mind?

Today’s list is the top 20 email subjects in my inbox.

Sounds thrilling, I know, but wait! Before you run away, let me give you some context.

Our childcare situation is pretty cool–I work, and N.C. stays home with the baby. He’s the stay at home dad. Which is all yay for him and yay for the baby, but kind of boo for me. I may have mentioned before that it rips me up a little bit inside to think of how much I miss with the kid by being at work. So when I went back to work, N.C. started sending me emails throughout the day, complete with photos, to help me stay a little connected. At first I thought it would suck, that constant reminder that I’m not home (where I want to be), the constant barrage of proof that I’m not with him. But honestly, those little emails are the absolute highlight of my day. Some days, I get one or two. Some days I get five. They all have pictures or a sound recording. And they absolutely brighten my day. And I keep them all, so my inbox is filled to overflowing with emails of the kid’s day to day.

But, my husband, he can be a bit of an oddnik. So some of the titles of these emails…well, you tell me:

1. Good morning from Mr. Surly McSpitup
2. I’m pretty sure cannibalism is from YOUR side of the family
3. Tonight we dine on lamb!!
4. Part hungry, part koala
5. Happier pooped nekkid baby
6. Bellytiiiiiiiime!!
7. Disapproving baby sez…
8. Aeriel survellience photos for your pleasure
9. An interlude in fussy and squealy
10. Monkey McSillyhead
11. Glornaps McMonkeyKnobs
12. Burrowing baby can haz milk bottle
13. BabyTronic functional and online
14. I thought ADD came much later
15. Clearly this weird behavior comes from YOUR genes
16. This is what happens when Dad gets bored while feeding… (ed. these are the ones that always give me pause)
17. Late feeding on the starboard side
18. I dub thee…SwaddleTron!
19. That’s not a bottle, that’s a PHONEY!
20. The King in his throne and a soggy Dino head

This is just a sampling of the strange email subjects that fill up my inbox. If someone were to hack my email, I figure they’d be VERY confused for a while!

As always, more lists can be found over at Anna’s at abdpbt!

Hey, how bout some letters, hmmm?

Dear Work,

Please stop trying to kill me. I beg of you.

Overworked,
Me

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Dear Battlestar Gallactica,

I know, I know I’m late to finding out how awesome you are. But you are totally rocking my world. I’m already sad to think of you ending, even though we still have 2 more seasons to get through. What will I do without my fix of Starbuck & Adama & co.? Until then, you keep rocking.

Wondering who else is a Cylon(but don’t tell me!),
Me

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Dear Kid,

So I know you’re probably going through a developmental spurt or something, but mommy’s not loving this sleep thing you’ve got going on–or rather this lack of sleep thing. The multiple wake-ups every night is not helping mommy’s stress level, so if we could go back to how things were a week ago, sleepwise, mommy would REALLY appreciate it.

Awake only through caffeine,
Mommy

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Dear Internet,

Thank you for providing me with moments of inspiration and humor this week. The laughter, intelligence, fun, and perspective you’ve given me during this stressful time have really helped. Keep it up!

Thankfully,
Me

I’m completely done with today.Work is officially trying to kill me. I’m trying to launch 4 websites by the end of this month, completely overhauling one e-commerce shopping cart, updating our database, planning our big conference for February, running a contest, getting 3 catalogs created and oh yeah, all the day to day crap that apparently no one else can do. I’m toast, and thus, you get blogging by bullet point.

• I feel like I’m the only blogger on the internet who doesn’t consider herself a writer. I mean, I write (obviously) but I have no great drive to write the next great American novel. I’d rather read it. Honestly, I’m sure those of you who ARE writers come to this site and feel assaulted by the over (and incorrect) usage of hypens, em dashes, ellipses, and commas. I’m sorry–I tend to write the way the voice in my head sounds–but since I have no inclination to be a Writer with a capital W, that’s how I roll.
• There are a lot of blog posts about privacy, and boundaries and such rolling through my reader. It seems like this comes up en masse every few months. It always makes me think, but I’m pretty happy with where my own privacy boundaries have been drawn. Do I sometimes wish I could unload my deepest darkest thoughts for the cathartic release that might provide? Yes, of course. But I’m pretty much a peace keeper in real life, so I would never want to put something on the internet that might result in upset or angry confrontation in person. But DAMN would I like to sometimes.
• To that same end, password protected posts irritate the hell out of me. Honestly, I get the purpose, but every time I see one I always just think “Why even bother to press publish?” I get writing it–you should see my drafts folder full of things I want to get off my chest–but why publish if you’re not going to make it available to everyone? It also has that whiff of clique-ness, like hey this is only for my REAL internet friends, not the rest of you. It doesn’t bother me enough to stop reading someone, but it does bother me.
• I’m full on bombarded by mommy guilt this week (which has a lot to do with the work situation I know). I kind of feel like I’m not making any of the right decisions, or that I’m making them for selfish reasons, or that I’m not in-tune enough with the kid. All of which is crap, I know in my logical mind. But shit if it’s not killing me anyway.
• Why have we made some of the “simple” things in our kid’s lives–like eating and sleeping and playing–so damn complicated? Everything must be researched, and weighed, and what is so and so doing, and is this ok, and shit if I do this will he grow up smart, and ARGHHH I’m going to permanently damage my child if I do/don’t do X. I’m totally guilty of it myself, of course, I just don’t know WHY we make it so hard. I have to tell myself to shut off my brain after a certain point, and just do what feels right for my kid, in this instance, with the knowledge that I have and what I believe.  I just wish I didn’t have to tell myself that, I wish I just did it.

And to round out this blog post, YAY, a baby photo!