I have been waiting, and waiting, and WAITING to share this post with you! (Calm down, I’m not pregnant).

One of the things I’ve wanted to do for a while now is to take some real, honest to goodness family photos. We never have pics with all three of us in them. We rarely have pics where more than one of us at a time looks halfway decent. And I wanted photos that captured Jackson in all his curly-haired, grayish-hazel eyed, toddler glory before those things were lost (I’ll still be forever sad that we never got a great picture of his eyes when they were the startling gray blue that so mesmerized me for over a year).

So when a local photographer (Fawn of Sequins and Candy whose work I ADORE) opened up some slots for holiday mini-sessions, I convinced N.C. that now was the time. And by now, I mean November. And by convinced, I mean bugged him, promised they’d be the bulk of our Christmas gifts to family, and swore up and down we’d be getting something that a friend with a camera couldn’t “just do” for us.

When the day of the photo shoot came, I was a wreck. We had a crazy frustrating day. Nothing seemed to be going right that day. I was super stressed. We were running late (like, dressing Jackson in the stroller waiting for cars to pass as we ran to the beach meeting spot kind of late). And then, when we got there, it was windy and cold, and Jackson…oh, Jackson was a PILL. He wanted nothing to do with anything  other than running in the ocean. For once, he wasn’t being friendly with a new person. He was throwing sand and fits, and nothing seemed to make him want to cooperate. Fawn worked away the whole time, but I remember thinking at one point, “As long as we get ONE semi-ok one, I’ll be happy. Please just let there be ONE.”

Well, lemme just say, Fawn must be a magician. And now that the Christmas gifts to family have been received, I can share the rabbit(s) she was able to pull out of the hat. Because I’m still not entirely sure where THIS family came from in THAT photo shoot:

To say that the pics captured what I’d hoped to capture is not saying enough.

If anything, they made me want WAY more than just 30 minutes with Fawn.

Because these look how my family feels and looks in my head.

(all photos courtesy of Sequins and Candy Photography, who I highly recommend for anyone in the area!)

Lately, we’ve been trying to take the kid and the dog to this great little trail near our house. The trail gets us out of the house, lets everyone get some fresh air and exercise, and, oh yeah, lets the dog and the kid burn off a great amount of pent up energy.  We get to go out into nature some–the trail features woodland, marsh, and a little creek (which lately, with the rain we’ve been getting, actually sounds like a creek. I love listening to it).

It’s been a great way to spend time as a family. Sasha runs around chasing birds and lizards. Jackson digs and draws in the dirt. We all run and chase each other around, generally filled with merriment and laughter.

I don’t know why we haven’t taken advantage of this trail before now. There was a time when we took Jackson there and walked with him in his stroller when he was little, but we haven’t been back in a while. Now though, it’s become a weekend event, at least once but up to 4 times over the two days I have off. When we turn down the street heading that way, Jackson yells TRAIL TRAIL, and Sasha’s tail starts to wag.

It’s nice to have these kinds of things to do as a family. There’s no obligations out on the trail. The rules are simple: “don’t fall down into the ravine,” “don’t drink the standing water,”no throwing rocks.” We just go out and enjoy being outside. As a family.

I’ve been in a funk the past couple of days. There are a bunch of reasons, some legitimate, some annoying, and some just plain whiny, but the general gist is that I’ve been in a very “woe-is-me” state of mind.

Of course, I don’t ENJOY being in a funk, so I’ve been trying to work to stop being in a funk but that never ends up working out the way you hope, right? I tried writing about it, but that post was so whiny and self-indulgent that I couldn’t bring myself to post it. I tried sleeping on it, and that didn’t help either.

You know what helped?

Yes, that is a baby in a bag

These guys. I know it sounds trite, but honestly, it was hanging out with my family. I came home last night and the kid was silly and N.C. was silly and we all were silly together. We played chase, and we stacked blocks, and we read books, and we tickled, and we laughed. There weren’t massive tantrums. There wasn’t biting, or hitting. There was only the bare minimum of throwing. It was a good 2 hours of enjoying my family, of living in the moment with them, not thinking about money or work or any of the other stuff that’s been swirling in my mind for the past few days. I let my toddler’s infectious laugh wash over me, lift my spirits and bring me along in his joy.

I still have a lot on my mind, a lot swirling. I’m still not entirely settled. But for a few hours, at least, my family helped to lift me out of my funk. And all I can say is thank goodness for my family.

Once again, I need some advice. Here’s the deal. I have to travel this summer for family reasons. My problem is that the family wants me to bring Jackson.

This wouldn’t be so bad, but because of the timing, N.C. can’t come. That means that I would be flying from CA to TX with my toddler alone. ACK.

Also because I’ve been sick all winter (read: have used almost all my PTO & want to try and accrue some more for the holidays at the end of the year), I can’t take a lot of days off. So we’re looking at, at most, 4 days, and more likely 3. Which wouldn’t be a big deal IF it weren’t for all the travel. Here’s what the weekend is looking like it might end up being:

Friday: 5-10 hours of travel (depending on flights/layovers)
Saturday: 3-4 hours of driving.
Sunday: 3-4 hours of driving
Monday 5-10 hours of flying (depending on flights/layovers)

This makes ME tired, but the idea of dragging Jackson through this? And the wear on both of us? I just…don’t know if I have the strength to do that all on my own. And my kid is so big, rambunctious, and high-energy that I don’t know if I can manage him the whole travel part of the trip (which, as you can see, is a lot) without another adult present. The idea of the plane rides alone…

But I’m giving it as much thought and attention as I can, because as much as my first (and 2nd, and 3rd) responses are OH HELL NO–there’s the part of me that knows how much my family wants to see Jackson. And how much I want Jackson to see them. And I know this may be the only trip we can make this year, and so the only trip where Jackson could see this family.

So…uh…any advice? Tips to make that kind of travel work solo with a squirmy toddler? Input on whether this is doable, or not? General HELP??

Last vacation post of our trip to San Francisco, I swear! I just had to share some more photos, and then, I promise, I’ll get back to real life and out of vacation mode. Maybe.

Be warned–this is a very pic heavy post! When you take a cute baby on vacation, what else do you expect? Proceed at your own peril:

The infamous Alcatraz. We didn’t go to the island this trip because we’ve both been–it’s an utterly creepy, surreal place. But it is a pretty picture.

We stayed in the Financial District, about 4 or 5 blocks from the Embarcadero area. Our hotel was the Le Meridien, and we had a beautiful bay view room on the 23rd floor. There were floor to ceiling windows that gave us a view of Coit Tower to the north and over by the Ferry building to the east. The kid LOVED standing up and looking out the window (and banging on the window too, he got quite the kick out of that). The first few times it was a little freaky for me to see him standing there, but eventually I got used to it.

The Ferry Building. We spent a LOT of time here–they’ve got amazing food vendors and restaurants here and it was only a few blocks from our hotel. Win-win.

My husband (and my reflection). Part of the reason for our trip was that it was our 4th wedding anniversary, and we like to try and celebrate every year by taking a vacation or at least getting a hotel room and pretending we’re on vacation. I’m so lucky to be married to him, and I’m so glad that he’s the father of my kid–he’s a fantastic husband and amazing father!

Have I mentioned that I love this kid?

Next time I’m complaining about parking, someone remind me of this photograph.

We went to the Aquarium of the Bay one day. It’s a smaller aquarium, but it’s got this cool tunnel that you walk through while fish and sharks swim around you. It was pretty neat. This photograph of the jellyfish wasn’t a part of the tunnel, but I thought it was so cool I had to share it (N.C. took this one).

More photos, less rambling….

Disapproving baby sez: That’s MORE than enough vacation photos!