Standing next to me, he fits right up under my ribs. It occurs to me that the last time that was true was a little over 5 years ago, but then it was more his feet bruising my ribs from the inside. Five years was forever ago, five years was just yesterday.
***
He is so full of personality* these days.
“OF COURSE we’re not going to have donuts for breakfast today Mommy, OF COURSE.”
“Mommy, I just can’t talk about that right now.”
“In a MINUTE Mommy. I’m busy with this.”
“NO. I said NO.”
*Personality, attitude, same difference some days.
***
He is also full of sweetness. He is free with hugs and kisses, for friends and family, and mommy and daddy. He loves to cuzzle at the end of the night, asking me “Mommy, let’s talk about our day.”
His smile and laugh are infectious. His joy is radiant. He is a bright sparkling star, bigger and brighter than anything I could have imagined.
***
I sometimes think, even five years in, that I don’t have what it takes to parent this vibrant ball of energy. He tests me, almost daily–tests my patience, tests my smarts, tests my energy, tests my compassion and what I think I know about parenting. He is my opposite in so many ways, and I don’t always know what to do with that.
And yet, I also know that I am perfect for him. Even when I’m not perfect. Even when I screw up. Even when I’m sure that something wasn’t my finest parenting moment. I’m still his mommy, and the perfect mommy for him.
***
Sometimes I look at him, at his smile and exuberance, and my heart catches in my throat. Parenting him is not easy, no. The challenges are real, and hard, and I can only hope I screw up less than I succeed. But the rewards? Oh man, the rewards are just breathtaking.
How beautiful. Congratulations on this milestone.
How sweet. Love to you guys and happy birthday to the boy.
Comments on this entry are closed.