Mommy, pay trains with me!
Mommy, hold my hand!
Mommy, do puzzles with me!
Sit next to mommy!
Mommy, I pick you up? (He has his I/you/me’s all mixed up)
No, MOMMY do it!
Mommy, come on! Come on mommy!
So, yeah. We’ve definitely hit a period of parental favoritism. And it’s simultaneously the most adorable, heartwarming and FREAKING EXHAUSTING THING ever. I love that he loves me. I love that he needs me. I love that he feels safe, and happy, and loved when I’m around.
I just ALSO know that I’m exhausted sometimes by the level of neediness. When I’m at home, he seems to want me for everything. I am constantly touched, and climbed, and held onto. I am constantly talked at, tugged, and engaged. I am…starting to feel a little claustrophobic at times.
I feel bad for feeling that way. I know my husband has him more hours than I do, and I know that his toddler neediness doesn’t go away when I’m not home. I know, also, that it’s going to come back at some point where he wants his dad all the time and it’s going to hurt my feelings. I know all those “you should be grateful” things.
But I also know that I am someone who needs time and space to myself to recharge, and with the current state of toddlerhood, I don’t get that.
I love this kid, so, so, so much man. I love how he says “Mommy be my best fwend” and how he sings the baby bumble bee song, and how he shares his toys with other kids (particularly littler kids). I love how he hugs, and how he laughs, and that he calls me daddy and N.C. mommy half the time.
But some days, I just need him to stop talking to me nonstop. To stop pulling on me. To stop climbing me. To stop yelling for me. To STOP TOUCHING ME SO MUCH.
Some days, I just need a little space.
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