A shy girl walks into a bar

by Ginger on July 15, 2010

in Blogging & Social Media

I’m thinking of doing something that makes me very, very uncomfortable to even imagine.

I’m thinking of going to a blogger meetup, filled with bloggers I’ve never even “spoken” with.

Just writing that fills me with a little bit of dread, but here’s the deal. On Monday, there’s a pre-BlogHer get together here in San Diego. As of this very moment, there are 13 women who have RSVP’d yes, and another 15 that are maybes (myself included). I read maybe 2 or 3 of those blogs, but only recently, and not to the point where someone would “know” me (like with you guys). Additionally, there is one blogger on there who, for some reason I’m unaware of, has blocked me on Twitter. I’m trying not to take it personally, since I don’t know her (but given that she has 950 followers, it is kind of weird. Am I THAT bad on Twitter? Whatev.). So that might be awkward.

Anyway, why do this? I’m not really involved with BlogHer, these ladies aren’t my internet friends, and it’s on Monday after work the opposite direction from my home. Plus there’s the whole, walking into a bar where I don’t know anyone and not even having a friend to go with in case no one talks to me trauma.

But here’s the thing. Or, the things.

  1. I’m really really really looking for some local friends. I…well, it’s getting kind of sad. So the idea of a room full of women where I at least have this blogging thing in common is appealing.
  2. I need to get better at networking. I’m trying to start a business, I’m trying to build my husband’s business, I want to do more with my life than what I’m currently doing. I need to get used to these kinds of things.
  3. An evening out would do me good.
  4. It would be nice to talk to some other bloggers. Like, for realsies. I’m always looking for blogger friends, online, and it would be nice if some of them were local so we could commiserate over the blogosphere in person.
  5. I’m jealous that I can’t go to BlogHer, so maybe this would give me something to tide me over until it’s over and everyone stops talking about it.

But I seriously don’t know if I have the cajones to walk into a bar full of women I don’t know and just…walk up to them and start talking. I just don’t know if I’ve got it in me (but I wanna, but I don’t, but I wanna, but I don’t! AGH!)

Anyone wanna come with me and hold my hand?

Sarah July 15, 2010 at 4:55 pm

I totally know what you’re talking about. I’d probably not end up going and then regret it… or go and throw up in the bathroom before entering the room, but love the party.

If I were in San Diego, I’d come with you. But I’m not. Good luck! You’ll go and have SO much fun. And that girl on twitter probably thought you were her ex-boyfriend’s sister’s enemy in high school (same name) and that’s why she blocked you. Nothing personal.

Alias Mother July 15, 2010 at 5:34 pm

You should go. And here’s why: the only thing that makes doing this sort of thing easier is…doing it. Sad, but true. Plus, all of your reasons are good, too.

Here’s another one: I live in the middle of nowhere and I’ve yet to find another blogger within 200 miles of me. Go. For my sake.

Ally July 15, 2010 at 5:51 pm

DO IT. You’re over-thinking it and I bet you will have more fun than you are imagining! Plus, at least it’ll make for a good story. 🙂

Rachel @ MWF Seeking BFF July 15, 2010 at 7:39 pm

Do it!! I know that feeling of dread and fear of awkwardness so well. I live it. But every single time–EVERY SINGLE TIME– it’s easier than I imagined and I’m so happy I went. I leave all excited and with renewed feelings of hope and wondering what I was all worried about in the first place.

Krissie July 16, 2010 at 5:04 am

I could’ve written this (but not as well).

You should go and I think you’ll be glad you did after the initial awkwardness passes. Last year I was experimenting with some mother’s groups that I found on meetup.com. I was totally nervous about it, but it was a lot of fun and I figured out that a lot of other people felt the same.

I’ll admit, a couple of cocktails helped a bit. (Mom’s night out, not a play date)

Plus, it would be good networking for your business. So, Win/Win. Good luck and have fun!

Lizzie July 16, 2010 at 9:57 am

If I didn’t live in England, I’d be there. I love doing that kind of thing though – just walking into a bar and not knowing who you’ll meet but maybe I’m the minority. And like you said, you already have blogging in common. Use that as a stepping stone and find out what else you have in common – worst thing is you’ll only have blogging in common, but it’s a start 🙂

Erin July 16, 2010 at 10:43 am

DO IT! Seriously. It’s a bit scary at first, but I swear you won’t regret it. I was so nervous to meet the bloggers in my area, and now they are some of my closest friends. Not only do I now have wonderful friends who are coming to my shower, whose weddings I’ve gone to…I’ve also gotten some amazing opportunities out of knowing them (umm, free mattress…what?). You’ll be nervous at first, but any time I’ve walked into a group of bloggers, I’ve felt instantly at home.

Megan July 16, 2010 at 11:09 am

I concur with everyone else. I think you’ll have a good time once you get over the initial awkwardness. And, if not? At least you have something to write about!

And next time you’re in LA, we should totally hang out!

Perpetua July 16, 2010 at 12:12 pm

Yes, DO IT. That said, I would have just as many reservations as you have, but. You are smart and funny, and you will be in a room with other smart, funny women who probably are just as freaked out by the whole thing. It’ll be weird for about ten minutes, and then it will be great.

As for the weird twitter thing, if she has a lot of followers, it’s possible she meant to block a spam person and clicked you by mistake. It happens. But maybe if you go there, and have a drink or two, you can go up to her and ask. 🙂

Kate July 16, 2010 at 8:52 pm

Go! Go! Go! Go! If I didn’t live 1500 miles away, I’d go in a heartbeat with you. Then we could be chickies together. 🙂

Trina July 17, 2010 at 11:01 am

You should go just to at least experience it. First it’s all women, second it’s bloggers. Let’s just say that my experience at random meetups for Startups has been horribly full of pretentious people that I would never really want to know. But Bloggers might be a safer group to start with.

Good luck hon! Too bad it’s not Wed-Friday next week or I would go with you.

The Sweetest July 18, 2010 at 2:02 pm

If I could go with you I would. You should totally go. What’s the worst thing that could happen? You’d feel uncomfortable enough to go home. So you go home- no biggie. I think you’ll be pleasantly surprised, though.

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